I
find some time to sit down and talk to Mart, it was not an easy conversation! I
talked through all my thoughts and feelings about the pregnancy and our options
at the end. I think he is relived I’ve made a choice about carrying the babies.
I can tell that he’s really not into the idea of adoption, but after explaining
that I don’t think I can go through with a selective reduction or termination
and that I would rather let nature take its course I think he understands. I
will never really know how he feels about this, but as far as I can tell and
feel, this is also a path that he is ready to take. We both feel that things
happen for a reason and whatever the reason may be, something tells us that we
need to continue this journey. He is really worried about the info he has been
reading in the press lately about the high number of babies in adoption homes
for so long. I fully understand what he is saying! The thought of the babies
alone in a home for so long before being adopted also scares me to death, but
we have to be open to what is realistically to come.
I
just keep thinking that if we don’t let this journey continue organically we
will never get the chance to potentially make this happen and be given the most
beautiful family as a result! Deep down I know and that there is a chance that
this could work out the way we want it to. I have done some more research into
companies that I can get in contact with about sponsorship or endorsement. I need to
wait until my 12 week scan before I can start contacting anyone as it is still
early days.
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